Dissociation: a Superpower
“The more intense the light (which can be a metaphor for life stressors), the more radiant the reflection.” ~Dr. Jamie Marich, Dissociation Made Simple
The nature of trauma is that it’s too much, and it overwhelms our system when it happens. Because of this, the brain and body utilize many different methods of protection for survival from the traumatic thing(s). One of the many common trauma symptoms survivors experience is dissociation. It’s normal, and its presentation can range in intensity depending on whether we’re experiencing short-term stress, or more impactful traumatic events.
Dissociation is normal.
Everyone dissociates.
Sometimes it can look like daydreaming… spacing out while driving… getting “lost” in a movie or book… staring blankly at the wall for a few moments… any of these sound familiar?
Dissociation is normal.
Sometimes our brain just needs a break for a moment. Sometimes it feels soothing to focus on a book or movie plot than face real life challenges. Dissociation is, essentially, a way our brains and bodies compartmentalize, take breaks, and preserve energy.
For trauma survivors, dissociation is often a way to “get through”, or survive the threatening thing, until the “danger is gone”.
Dissociation might feel more like floating or observing yourself from outside of your body… or experiencing the world through a thick fog… a warped sense of time and space… sensing that your body isn’t your own or you aren’t real (depersonalization)… sensing that the world around you isn’t real (derealization)… and much more.
For some, the danger later goes away, and the survivor can resume a felt sense of safety. For others, the danger doesn’t or hasn’t gone away - sometimes it lives in the same home, returns on a regular basis, consistently shows up in news headlines or social media posts, and/or there are reminders of it everywhere.
For these folks, a return to a felt sense of safety isn’t accessible, and therefore, it doesn’t feel safe to move through the world in an “embodied” way. It can feel safer, in some cases, to maintain some degree of dissociation in order to continue functioning in the world, especially if/when other survival strategies aren’t working or aren’t accessible.
Dissociation: a Superpower
In that way, dissociation is a sort of superpower for survival when the world doesn’t feel safe.
Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) is a diagnosis in the DSM-5 acknowledging that sometimes, for survival, folks have parts of themselves that take on roles of holding the wounds of trauma, or protecting their system by moving towards soothing, or away from perceived danger, in various ways.
This can sometimes cause someone to seemingly present as if they were two or more different people at different times. Dr. Jamie Marich is an expert in the field in treating structural dissociation. They identify themselves as a plural system, and have been open about their own parts or alters (language for this can vary depending on individual preferences). They’ve identified several younger parts, as well as “Dr. Jamie”, and just “Jamie”. They describe dissociation as prismatic.
“Light flows through a prism to reflect a series of colors—the more angles on a prism, the more dramatically light splits as it comes through—resulting in fascinatingly complex and stunningly beautiful patterns and fractals… The more intense the light (which can be a metaphor for life stressors), the more radiant the reflection.” ~Dr. Jamie Marich, from their book Dissociation Made Simple
With more life stressors, protective parts work harder to keep us safe, whatever that may mean, however it makes sense in that moment.
When we build more trusting relationships between our own parts, we have greater awareness of what each part may need to feel an increased sense of safety and ease, as well as what traumas may need to be safely processed.
Pause, and notice what comes up for you with these topics. What reactions show up in your body? What sounds familiar to your experience, and what doesn’t? What questions arise?
As a trauma therapist, I feel incredibly privileged to get to do the work I do, and to get to work with such powerful and resilient survivors. It’s truly incredible how our brains and bodies keep us alive through such traumatic experiences. If any of this resonates with you, take a look around the rest of my site for more resources and information. You and your parts deserve to experience healing.
